Matthew's Mother

I was getting Tyler's lunch ready last week, and as I was trying to decide what kind of lunchable to throw in his lunchbox, I heard a little voice behind me say, "Matthew's mother makes him a peanut butter sandwich". To which I replied, "let me guess..you want me to make you a peanut butter sandwich for lunch today?". This earned an affirmative nod. I was about to place the requested sandwich in a baggie when I heard a little voice say, "Matthew's mother always cuts his in half". I got out a knife and sliced the sandwich in two. Next I went to the pantry to try to decide what else to throw in the box. This earned an eye roll, a defeated sigh, and a "Matthew's mother always sends Teddy bears," spoken through clenched teeth. I threw in some little bears. Next, I reached for a juice box. This of course was met with further resistance. Apparently, Matthew's mother sends a thermos of ice cold water. A request I couldn't live up to because I had no idea where our thermos were currently hiding much less where I might locate a lid that might actually fit. So I simply said, "Good for her!" and forced him out the door.

Fast forward to today. I just happened to come across a thermos with a lid on it in a drawer. I thought I'd surprise my little food critic with it. So I lovingly filled it with water and shoved it in his little lunchbox.

When Tyler got in the car today after school, I was met with a death glare, more clenched teeth, and a "why did you send a thermos full of water in my lunch?". "Because I wanted to be awesome like Matthew's mother". This got another eye roll, a look that told me the depth of my stupidity, and a "Matthew's mother always sends him juice!".


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